Alright, I had my first Weight Watchers meeting last night and my fear came true... I'm a lot fatter than I thought I was. Now I can totally relate to an anorexic or bulimic, but on an opposite scale. I think it's called Body Dysmorphic Disorder only most people think they're fatter than they are... not me... I see myself skinnier than I actually am. I mean, I always knew I was heavy, but not this heavy, in fact I think I technically fall into the category of Obese - a word I never wanted to describe me. All this means is that I have an even greater challenge ahead of me and the results will be that much sweeter.
Now the decision comes between counting "points" or just eating foods on the approved list... only, looking at the "approved list" there's a TON of stuff on there that I do eat already, so what's the change?!?!? I'm thinking that I'll do the "points" system since I'm already going to be doing a food journal, what's the difference figuring out the "point" that goes with it, right?
Mary, as usual was amazing last night, when I left the WW meeting and wanted to just cry and cheer at the same time, cry because of the shock of my size and Cheer because I'm actually doing this... no excuses. She reminded me that the current number doesn't matter anymore and the result is what matters... so we need to keep our eye on the prize and look forward, not back. We also decided that when we hit our "Goal" we are going to go away, just the two of us. We're thinking Vegas! but on second thought... maybe we should go to Mexico or the Caribbean so that I can wear a bathing suit and for the first time, feel good about myself in it.
The response to this blog from friends has been astounding... a few have even offered to start walking with me during the week and it seems as though I'm starting to motivate others... it's a movement. I know it seems pretty severe to put all this out there for the whole world to see, but we all have different ways to motivate ourselves and this is my way of doing it. I've tried to lose weight on my own, and well, clearly it didn't work, so now I'm trying to do it with the support of the world and I just know that this will work - this has to work.
To all those who are checking in on me I do want to send out the message that I am ok... I have never, nor will I ever judge my self-worth based upon my weight... I do know that I'm an incredible person and I have no intentions of changing who I am on the inside... but let's get real here folks... my exterior needs a make-over, BIG TIME. So I do appreciate ALL the encouragement and support and I just want you all to know that I'm not "beating-up" on myself, I'm just being real, and I'm still me.
6 comments:
Warm and sunny sounds amazing. We haven't done that since Acapulco!! (Dare I say that's been over ten years??)
OOHH MY GOSH, I really need to go back to being a blonde - I just realized this is where to leave the comments - ha! Well hopefully it made you laugh at least!! HA!You are truly an amazing person. It takes someone with tremendous character to put something like this together. I have no doubt that you will succeed and actually exceed your goal – you’re too stubborn not to ;o) If you have a day where you need some tough love though, you can count on me to tell it to you straight with no sugar, I mean splenda, coating! I have several Weight Watcher’s cookbooks that have some great recipes in them. Let me know if you want them. Without sounding too sappy, I’m thankful to have met you and to be your friend – you are what’s known as quality people my friend! Thank you so much for sharing this experience with me. I’m happy to help you along this journey in any way that I can. Now go kick some ARSE!!!
I have always admired your determination. No one stops Liz when she's decided to do something. I'm sure, now that you've made up your mind to do this, you won't stop yourself either. I'm behind you all the way to offer any help and support that I can. I'm sure Mike has lots of running tips too if you need them. I'm so excited to see what happens and, it might sounds silly to say but, I'm so proud of you. Work hard; I know you can do it!!!
Liz, I am so incredibly proud of you. I have always thought that you had such a strong sense of who you are as a person, and your focus and determination are a big part of that. I will support you in every way that I can, and I can't wait to see you in May! love you lots.
wow liz this is amazing! i am so proud of you and almost jealous because you have the courage to do it unlike me!! Ive always thought about weight watchers or just anything! and like you said, i've always felt like the "fat friend" to and somedays i totally forget that im a lil chubby ..its like you forget to look at the size you actually are! i praise you so much for what you are doing! best of luck!!!!!!!! i cant wait to hear how everything goes.
Natalie
My dear sweet precious daughter...your gentle, beautiful spirit can be encased in any body and you will always be the light of our lives (along with your brother.) Aunt Karen's death has had a profound impact on Daddy as well. Daddy has also started Weight Watchers and is really stoked. Now the two Simmons "peas in a pod" have an additional support system! I feel your pain and struggle and have shared this journey with you over the years. You and Daddy are always my inspiration, will continue to be during this success story in the making, and I will always provide you any and all the support you need. Last night was your moment of surrender and today is a day of new beginnings. Baby steps will bring you miles of success stories. I am so very proud of you! Feel my hugs and know that I am there for you always and forever. I love you with all my heart.
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